


all the time in the world

by veirtige



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: A lot - Freeform, Akaashi Misses Bokuto, Anxiety, Anxious Akaashi Keiji, Background Relationships, BokuAka Week, Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, I love Akaashi I swear, Kuroo Tetsurou is a Good Friend, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Mental Health Issues, My First Work in This Fandom, Not Beta Read, Out of Character, Overthinking, Platonic Cuddling, Pro Volleyball Player Bokuto Koutarou, Self-Doubt, Self-Esteem Issues, Tsukishima Kei is a Good Friend, it kinda looks like akakurotsukki which was unintentional i swear, probably?, this was for bokuaka week but i didn't finish anything else
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-18
Updated: 2020-08-18
Packaged: 2021-03-06 08:14:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,791
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25966459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/veirtige/pseuds/veirtige
Summary: “Are you always awake at this time?”Akaashi blinked at Tsukishima as he wiped down a nearby table, tearing his gaze away from his laptop where he’d been furiously typing for hours nonstop. “What?”“It’s nearly one in the morning, you’ve been here at this time and even later consistently the last two weeks.”--in which sometimes we believe the lies our minds tell us, something that Akaashi Keiji is no stranger to.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji & Bokuto Koutarou, Akaashi Keiji & Kuroo Tetsurou, Akaashi Keiji & Tsukishima Kei, Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Bokuto Koutarou & Kuroo Tetsurou, Bokuto Koutarou & Tsukishima Kei, Kuroo Tetsurou/Tsukishima Kei
Comments: 12
Kudos: 133





	all the time in the world

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first time posting a haikyuu fic so Please be kind i am trying my best.  
> originally this was for day 1 of bokuaka week [coffee shop au + confessions] but it spiralled into this mess?  
> i tagged it as ooc because i'm very self conscious about my writing still but hopefully it's not too bad.  
> i've reread this so many times so i hope there's no spelling errors but apologies if there is; it's currently 4am.

“Are you always awake at this time?”

Akaashi blinked at Tsukishima as he wiped down a nearby table, tearing his gaze away from his laptop where he’d been furiously typing for hours nonstop. “What?” 

“It’s nearly one in the morning, you’ve been here at this time and even later consistently the last two weeks.”

“It’s not that big of a deal, thank you, Tsukishima.” There was emotion lacking in his reply, he knew that. He knew that he should be trying harder to maintain the act that he was getting enough but he was  _ not _ getting enough sleep and there was only so much caffeine could do to stave off the exhaustion that followed him around constantly. Tsukishima still hadn’t walked away. “I’m just working on an assignment.”

“How many days has it been?” Tsukishima’s eyes didn’t move away, even when Akaashi averted his knowing gaze. If he told him the truth, he’d tell Bokuto and he’d worry and then Akaashi would just feel worse and- “Akaashi.”

“I don’t know what you mean.” Akaashi shifted in his seat, unconsciously fiddling with his fingers. Tsukishima’s eyes darted down to his hands and then back to his face, where Akaashi refused to make eye contact and he sighed.

He grumbled under his breath as he headed back behind the counter, knowing he wouldn’t get anywhere. Akaashi was stubborn. He wouldn’t just admit it with a fixed glare like others usually would.

He returned his focus to his nearly finished assignment, anxiety flaring in his chest as he noticed the word count wasn’t as high as he had anticipated. What if it was too short? He’d fail the semester and,  _ god, _ how could he face Bokuto if he failed-

“Oi.”

He peered over his laptop that he had unknowingly leaned into to further immerse himself in his work. He was met with the sight of Kuroo Tetsurou holding his bag. Wait, his bag?

“That’s my bag.” Akaashi stated. Kuroo met this with a nod and a slight grin as he replied, “I’m glad you noticed. We’re going.”

An eyebrow raised at this and he glanced over at Tsukishima who had busied himself with collecting his own belongings as he handed off the key to whoever was closing, finishing up his shift. He looked smug and that’s when Akaashi realised that he had  _ told Kuroo. _

“It’s not like that,” Akaashi spoke quickly, the fact that he was once again fiddling with his fingers directly contrasting his miserable attempt to remove all suspicion, “it’s fine.”

“If it’s fine then you’ll be more than happy to have an impromptu sleepover with Kei and I.” Kuroo grinned, then paused; “I also asked Bo and he very kindly informed me that the assignment you’re working on is extra credit, so no, you may not use that as an excuse.”

Akaashi sighed, knowing resistance was futile. He slowly shut his laptop, adamantly ignoring the victorious grin that had broken out on Kuroo’s face and not missing the relieved expression that Tsukishima didn’t bother holding back.

His mind was going at a hundred miles an hour, guilt burrowing itself deep inside of his chest at the thought that he was burdening his two close friends. He followed the couple to the parking lot, lagging behind as exhaustion impaired his movements. His body was slowing down whereas his mind seemed to  _ speed up _ , with him attempting to focus on listening to Kuroo questioning Tsukishima on his day, desperate to focus on anything but his thoughts.

He settled himself into the backseat of Kuroo’s car, watching the world pass by. The headlights of passing cars were the only thing illuminating his face, until his phone buzzed and lit up in his hand. A small smile decorated his face as he received a photograph from his boyfriend - a team photograph where Bokuto was proudly holding a medal, surrounded by his teammates. 

_ Bokuto Koutarou [00:50] _

_ ‘Kaashi! We won again!!! One game left then I can come home! It’s so fun here!!!!!!!!!!! _

_ Miss you!! _

_ Have fun with Tsukki and Kuroo, love ya!!! _

The overuse of exclamation marks from anybody else would irritate him, but from Bokuto it brought a sense of comfort and familiarity that Akaashi was desperate for. It had been nearly a month and a half since Bokuto had departed to a training camp slash tournament - longer than they were both used to.

He’d been away for three months once, but Akaashi had managed bi-weekly visits then. This time, though, it would’ve been useless - Bokuto was either training, playing a match or working out with his teammates and the friends he had made there.  _ No room for him _ , his mind reminded him.

He was happy, and enjoying himself the way he used to enjoy their high school training camps; a feeling Akaashi didn’t want to take away from him. So while Bokuto was having the time of his life, Akaashi was the opposite. He had been overworking himself by taking on a mountain of extra credit work, eager to avoid the loneliness he felt in their apartment.

Lying to Bokuto about taking care of himself when his boyfriend was three hundred kilometres away wasn’t exactly hard, however lying to friends like Kuroo and Tsukishima who  _ knew _ his telltale signs of both mental and physical exhaustion was growing increasingly more difficult. 

They wouldn’t hesitate to call Bokuto and inform him that his boyfriend was in fact neglecting his own needs in favour of distractions, which in turn would cause Bokuto to drop everything and come home and - as nice as a thought that  _ was _ , it was something Akaashi wouldn’t let happen.

He refused to get in the way of Bokuto’s dreams.

With a quiet sigh, he began thumbing a response to Bokuto, realising he had left him on seen for three minutes. Way to be inconspicuous. 

_ Akaashi Keiji [00:50] _

_ Glad that you’re enjoying it. I can’t wait to hear more. _

_ I miss you, too. _

_ Not sure how fun third wheeling them will be. _

_ I love you. _

Akaashi stared at the chat for a moment before turning his phone off, knowing Bokuto was probably getting ready for bed. The car slowed to a stop and Akaashi looked up in time to see Kuroo hand over money to the window employee at a McDonald’s drive thru. As the bags of food were given to him, he passed them onto Tsukishima who turned to give what he couldn’t hold to Akaashi so that he could place them in the empty seat beside him.

Kuroo pulled back onto the main road, cursing under his breath as the traffic lights turned red just as he pulled up. Tsukishima messed with the car radio for a few seconds, before settling on one of Kuroo’s CD’s from his emo phase which immediately caused him to start drumming on the steering wheel in time to the beat. With anyone else, the absence of conversation would feel suffocating, but with his two best friends it felt relaxing.

Already he was feeling anxious at the fact that he wasn’t currently working. He didn’t want to fail this assignment, didn’t want to fail his  _ course. _ He was working part time at a convenience store run by one of Bokuto’s cousins while simultaneously interning at a publishing company, and he hoped to become a full-time employee in the literature department after graduation - but what if he didn’t graduate? 

The thought of the pity he’d receive for failing to graduate made his skin crawl and he pressed his forehead against the cool glass of the car window, tuning everything else out. He closed his eyes and inhaled, wishing Bokuto was with him. That thought just led to him spiralling once again into feeling guilt and regret for something as simple as wanting his boyfriend to be with him.

How dramatic he was to turn into a mess because his boyfriend was busy doing what he loved. And now here Akaashi was, interrupting his best friends' lives all because he failed to perform basic actions such as sleeping and eating. What if they were mad that they had to do this? Bokuto had probably begged them to and they were all just pretending he didn’t know how Akaashi was because he was tired of dealing with him and his anxiety-

“Stop overthinking.” Akaashi looked up, startled, but realised they were parked outside of Tsukishima and Kuroo’s apartment. He hadn’t noticed that they had arrived and he inhaled as Tsukishima stepped back from the open car door, waiting for him to get out.

“I wasn’t-”

He withered underneath the look Tsukishima gave him, although it was to be expected. Last year, Tsukishima overburdened himself with shifts at his part time job in a twenty four hour convenience store on top of classes and the university volleyball that he had taken up, causing him to have a breakdown. A result of this was him hiding from everybody and locking himself in Akiteru’s apartment for four days before Keiji had called Kuroo who  _ had _ been away visiting family but immediately dropped everything to return to Tokyo.

Tsukishima had been pretty annoyed at Akaashi at the time, but it had quickly melted away into gratitude. He knew that Akaashi was just trying to look out for him, and deep down Akaashi knew Tsukishima was just doing exactly what he would do if their roles were reversed again - but he didn’t feel like he deserved it.

He didn’t deserve Kuroo and Tsukishima’s friendship, didn’t deserve the occasional texts from his old Fukurodani teammates checking up on him, he didn’t deserve Bokuto. His mind had wandered down a whole new route, and Tsukishima was unwilling to let it go further. “ _ Keiji. _ Come on.”

Akaashi finally complied, dragging himself out of the car, a new fear that he had annoyed Tsukishima enough to warrant the usage of his given name making itself known. He began following him up the three flights of stairs (the elevator was broken, Tsukishima had explained) to their apartment.

“I’m not mad at you, you know.” They had stopped directly outside of the door that was left slightly ajar from Kuroo entering a few minutes prior with the McDonald’s he had collected. When Akaashi didn’t reply, he continued. “Tetsu isn’t either. We’re just worried about you.”

Akaashi made a sound to let him know he heard him, only causing a sigh as Tsukishima could feel his friend withdraw even more. Tsukishima pushed the door open to reveal Kuroo, now wearing pyjamas bottoms and a hoodie, kneeling in front of the television, sorting through DVD’s that they owned. Their takeout was now put on plates that sat on the coffee table.

“Sorry for the intrusion,” Akaashi mumbled as he pulled his shoes off and left them beside the two other pairs at the door. Kuroo waved at him without looking up, snorting. “No need to be so formal.”

Tsukishima disappeared down the hall before quickly returning, now clad in an oversized sweater and some sweatpants. He immediately made his way over to the couch, curling up in the corner and beginning to tug the fluffy blanket used for movie nights out from its place under the sofa. Kuroo was cackling to himself, pulling a raised eyebrow from Akaashi and a groan from Tsukishima.

“Tetsu, I swear to God if it’s Titanic again-”

“It’s not, I swear! It’s even better!”

“You know I banned the Lego Movie. I’m not listening to that stupid ‘everything is awesome’ song bullshit for another week.” Tsukishima was now glaring at his boyfriend who was shielding whatever selection he had made from them.

“It’s not the Lego Movie. It’s the Lego  _ Batman _ movie!”    
  


Akaashi couldn’t recall a time where he had ever seen Tsukishima look so horrified and Kuroo so proud, but somehow not even the comedic expressions on their faces could distract Akaashi from the wave of fear that he was ruining their night.

“Oi, Keiji, I can hear you thinking from over here!” Kuroo called as he searched for the remote to the DVD player. When, to his boyfriend’s dismay, he held it up victoriously, he continued; “if I turn around and do not see my boyfriend and my best friend cuddled up while they eat their chicken nuggies, I will be  _ severely _ upset!”

“Did you just say chicken nuggies?” 

“Kei, why must you judge me?”

“You’re a twenty one year old man wearing Spongebob Squarepants pyjamas pants with Minecraft socks while putting on the Lego Batman movie and calling chicken nuggets ‘chicken nuggies’, and I’m meant to  _ not _ judge you?” 

Akaashi couldn’t stifle the small laugh that came out at that, because he couldn’t disagree. The sight of Kuroo Tetsurou, well known amongst their friend circle for being a ‘fashion icon’, standing in his living room in what could only be described as a disastrous choice of pyjamas was amusing - even an exhausted and downtrodden Akaashi could agree with that.

“Keiji! Don’t take his side! I am also giving you only thirty more seconds before I turn around. Do not think that I will not carry you to the couch, ‘cause I will.” Kuroo threatened, fumbling with the buttons on the remote.

Akaashi was silent as he ambled over to the sectional sofa, settling against the arm. This received a look from Tsukishima. “Tetsu’s sitting there. Don’t act like we don’t know you - we’re not letting you sit there until we fall asleep so you can go sneak off to your laptop to continue that assignment. Tetsu’s hidden your bag anyways.”

“I’m not going to do that.” Akaashi tried his best to seem defensive, but it was impossible when he was reminded of his past failed attempts with this from the last time he had been left alone in his and Bokuto’s apartment for more than two weeks. Tsukishima rolled his eyes as Kuroo turned around and glared at Akaashi, walking over and standing in front of him.

“Scoot.”

“I’m quite comfortable here, thank you. Go and cuddle with your boyfriend, if you’d like.”

“I can cuddle with my boyfriend  _ and _ my best friend. Now scoot before I scoot you myself.” Kuroo threw the remote over to Tsukishima who caught it effortlessly.

While Akaashi just averted his gaze again, instead choosing to stare at the floor beside Kuroo, Tsukishima and Kuroo had a silent conversation through their eyes. A decision seemed to have been made as without warning, Kuroo had hunkered down to his knees and scooped Akaashi into his arms, eliciting a startled yelp. “Put me down-”

“Oh hush, am I really that bad?” Tsukishima rolled his eyes, handing a plate of food to Akaashi as Kuroo dropped him down right beside him. “Very rude to deny two of your favourite people some cuddles.”

“I’m just interrupting! I shouldn’t even be here, I’m just wasting your time by being stupid and miserable over something so ridiculous, I’m sorry, I think I’m going to go…” Akaashi trailed off as he began to get up, until an arm wrapped around his chest and pushed him back against the sofa.

“Akaashi Keiji, listen to me now,” Tsukishima really  _ was  _ glaring at him now. “You’re interrupting nothing. I promise. We’re doing this willingly because we care for you and your well being, and no offence, but you’re shit at taking care of yourself lately. You are not wasting our time, you never have and you never will. You did this for me last year when I ran myself into the ground, and I know you’d do the same again.”

Kuroo nodded, moving over until he was right beside Akaashi, who was frozen in shock. “You’re not stupid for missing your boyfriend. It’s normal, especially when you’re not used to such a long time period without him. We want you here, and we want you to take care of yourself. Tsukki’s about to watch the Lego Batman movie just to try help cheer you up. He wouldn’t do that for just anybody!”

“Tetsu,  _ you _ chose that movie.”

“Yes, but I know Keiji very well and he was definitely going to pick that if given the choice!”

Before Tsukishima could even attempt to retort, they were interrupted by a choked back sob. They both immediately looked at Akaashi in worry, but realised he had a small smile on his face despite the few tears he couldn’t contain.

“I really am sorry-”

“Stop apologising!” 

“Shut up, Tsukki, let him finish!”

“I just, my brain…” Akaashi was struggling to form a comprehensible sentence, not used to the focus being on how he feels. They sat in silence, not pushing him to speak and waiting. It took a few minutes, but he tugged at his fingers out of habit as he finally tried to articulate his thoughts. “My brain just makes me feel bad… and I’m scared to tell Bokuto that, because it’s selfish that it gets worse when he’s not around. I mean, I’m  _ twenty _ for God’s sake, I should be able to deal with it yet I can’t even talk to my boyfriend about how I feel. I’m sorry. I hope I’m not ruining your evening…”

“Again, you’re not ruining anything. We’re glad you’re here, we just want to look after you since Bo can’t. I-  _ we _ don’t want to push you to do anything you’re uncomfortable with, but you need to let Bo know what’s going on. He loves you, and he’s not shy with letting everyone know that. You’re the most important person in his life. Don’t blame yourself for something that’s out of control. We can drop the topic for the night if that’s what you want, but we’re here to support you no matter what you do. However, if you try to apologise for having emotions one more time serious action will be taken in the form of me waking you up everyday dancing to the Pussycat Dolls.”

Akaashi was nearly frightened at how sincere Kuroo was being, with Tsukishima’s fervent nodding after every sentence except for the last, where he just shot Kuroo a disgusted look causing him to bark out a laugh. Akaashi fiddled with the hem of the blanket that Tsukishima had managed to trap him under without him noticing, slowly nodding. “I’ll… think about it. Thank you.”

The duo understood that Akaashi was done with the topic for now, so Kuroo grabbed the plates that had been abandoned on the coffee table and passed them out, a sinister grin on his face. “Are you ready for the best one hour and forty five minutes of your life?”

“I hope you appreciate the time we’ve been together,” Tsukishima paused to chew on another fry before finishing his sentence and fixing his boyfriend with a glare, “because I’m breaking up with you for literally anybody else when this movie is done.”

“Tsukki!” Kuroo whined, a quiet laugh coming from Akaashi in the middle, “you love me, and you’re going to love this movie.”

Tsukishima rolled his eyes and didn’t reply as he pressed play, and the trio lapsed into a comfortable silence as they ate the now slightly cold takeout, only broken by Kuroo’s laughter and the odd snort from Tsukishima at any and all dumb comments made.

Akaashi remained silent for the most part and was adamant on staying awake for the entire movie, hoping to possibly sneak to the bathroom where he could use his phone to continue his assignment for a bit, but exhaustion had finally caught up in the game of cat and mouse it had been playing with his body for the last few weeks.

His eyes kept closing, only for him to jump awake seconds later when he caught himself. Tsukishima kept glancing at him whenever he jumped awake, a frown on his face. The movie was nearing its midpoint, and apparently both Kuroo and Tsukishima were fed up with Akaashi fighting against his bodies attempts to sleep as they had somehow managed to shift around so that Akaashi’s head lay against Tsukishima’s chest, with him running his hands through his hair. His legs now lay over Kuroo’s lap, with him gently tracing shapes on Akaashi’s arm that lay atop the blanket they all huddled under - two habits he knew Bokuto had informed them helped when trying to coax Akaashi to sleep.

“Kei, Tetsurou,” Akaashi forced the words out of his mouth, fighting the comfort and drowsiness that their actions brought, “stop.”

Both men ignored his request (which he was secretly grateful for) and Akaashi let out a sigh as he sank further into his friend. Sure, Tsukishima didn’t radiate the body heat Bokuto did, and Kuroo’s hand felt less rough considering he no longer played volleyball for any team now that he was in his third year of business studies, but combined their efforts were slowly taking effect as Akaashi slumped further into Tsukishima.

The ache that came with missing Bokuto had returned almost like a stab to the chest. Fortunately, his brain was too slow and relaxed to even consider overthinking the possible ‘what if’ scenarios that he usually forced himself to endure on a day-to-day basis. The television volume had been lowered until it was practically a quiet hum and the room was lit up in a faint, calming glow from the screen.

Eventually Akaashi had lost all of the energy that he was putting into trying to stay awake, and at long last he succumbed to sleep, sinking further against his friends. It wasn’t unusual for their movie nights to result in the group cuddling, except without Bokuto to wrap around like a koala, it felt like a large part of what made it enjoyable for Akaashi was missing.

“Kuroo,” Tsukishima hissed, finally noticing that Akaashi was limp against him. Kuroo startled, engrossed in watching what he deemed ‘sexual tension never seen before in the Lego Cinematic Universe between Batman and the Joker’, but when he looked down and noticed the slowed breathing coming from Akaashi and the sight of his slightly skewed glasses as his head lay at an awkward angle, a grin broke out. “Finally. Bo’s gonna kill him when he finds out he’s been overworking himself again.” 

Tsukishima just scoffed at that, slightly shifting how he lay so they’d all feel more comfortable. “Don’t act like you didn’t freak out when Akaashi called about me last year.”

“You  _ and _ Akaashi both work yourselves into the ground constantly. Let me and Bo worry. Plus, Akiteru was freaking out too. Along with most of our friends.” 

Tsukishima didn’t bother replying properly, simply muttering something that sounded like a ‘shut up’, turning back to the movie and rolling his eyes as not long after, Kuroo had teared up. Tsukishima wasn’t even sure what he was tearing up  _ at, _ he had long forgotten what was going on in the movie after focusing on trying to make Akaashi sleep. 

A yawn escaped him and he brought his hand up to cover his mouth, leaning further into the pillows behind him and adjusting the blanket. It wasn’t long before he was also asleep, leaving Kuroo as the only one to witness ‘a cinematic win for the gays’ (nobody would ever know how Kuroo managed to see such emotional depth in a Lego movie).

He stood up and stretched before grabbing the long abandoned plates left from their food and made his way to the kitchen, dumping them in the sink before heading to the bathroom. When he came back, he grinned at the sight of Akaashi hogging most of the blanket now, basking in its warmth.

He quickly pulled his phone out to take a photo, saving it before sending it to Bokuto.

_ Kuroo Tetsurou [02:17] _

_ [IMG attached] _

_ I think I’m going to steal your boyfriend for myself. Finally got him to sleep. _

Kuroo went to shut his phone off for the night, but surprisingly Bokuto had text back.

_ Bokuto Koutarou [02:18] _

_ AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA _ _  
_ _ AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA _

_ I MISS HIM!!!! HE’S SO CUTE!!!!!! BRO LOOK AT HIM!!!!! _

_ Kuroo Tetsurou [02:18] _

_ I KNOW BRO _

_ BUT LOOK AT TSUKKI _

_ Bokuto Koutarou [02:19] _

_ BUT KAASHI!!!! _

_ WAIT _

_ Finally??? What happened _

Kuroo froze, realising his mistake. Both he and Tsukishima had agreed upon not telling Bokuto until he got back, figuring their intervention would be enough for now. 

_ Bokuto Koutarou [02:20] _

_ Tetsurou what’s going on? _

_ Is it an emergency? _

_ Kuroo Tetsurou [02:18] _

_ Don’t be mad _

_ Seriously _

_ Kei and I were going to tell you when you got back _

_ He’s been overworking again. He wouldn’t tell us the full reason, and I don’t think it’s my place to repeat what he told me. I told him to talk to you about it. _

Once he had been addressed as Tetsurou along with a normal amount of punctuation, Kuroo knew that Bokuto was now panicking. He watched the text bubble that signified that Bokuto was typing reappear and vanish multiple times before a reply finally came through.

_ Bokuto Koutarou [02:20] _

_ I’m not mad _

_ I swear _

_ Did I do something wrong??? _

_ Is he okay?? _

_ Kuroo Tetsurou [02:20] _

_ Of course not, Bo _

_ He’s just working himself into the ground as a distraction _

_ He misses you a lot, it just hit harder this time. _

_ Bokuto Koutarou [02:21] _

_ I was going to ask you and Tsukki to help me surprise him, the tournament actually ends tomorrow afternoon, the rest of the week is just downtime for teams to slowly leave whenever - I could be home by seven?? _

_ Would that be a bad idea??? _

_ Kuroo Tetsurou [02:21] _

_ We’re more than happy to help. _

_ I think it’s a great idea, he misses you a lot. _

_ Are you okay? _

_ Bokuto Koutarou [02:22] _

_ I don’t know _

_ I knew that something was wrong but not like this again _

_ How bad is it?? _

_ Kuroo Tetsurou [02:22] _

_ Not as bad as that time from his third year. Getting close though. _

_ Is there anything Kei and I can do to help more? _

_ Bokuto Koutarou [02:23] _

_ Don’t leave him alone for the day _

_ Please _

_ That’s a lot to ask I know _

_ Let him work if he wants but make him take breaks and eat _

_ I’m going to call him out of work for a week maybe. _

_ Kuroo Tetsurou [02:23] _

_ Of course, Bo _

_ Kei’s in work in the morning but I’ll stay with him. I might get called in near midday but his shift should be over so he won’t be alone for long. _

_ You should get some sleep if you’re going to be playing tomorrow _

_ Bokuto Koutarou [02:24] _

_ Yeah. Thanks for this. Really. Love you bro!! _

_ Kuroo Tetsurou [02:24] _

_ Love you too _

Kuroo groaned and turned around to go turn the television off, fearing for Tsukishima’s reaction to his slip up. He threw his phone behind him, vaguely in the direction of what he thought was where he was sitting, until he heard a grunt and he turned out to be met with a groggy Tsukishima.

“What the fuck?” He groaned, grabbing the phone and opening his eyes, fixing Kuroo with probably what should be a glare but with being half asleep, it had no bite.

“Oops?” Kuroo stifled a laugh, immediately holding his breath as Akaashi shifted where he lay.

“I was ready to kill you if he woke up.”

“Okay, but he didn’t. Also, if you want to kill me, here’s a valid reason; I accidentally told Bo about Akaashi’s lack of self care.”

He expected a pillow flung at his face, maybe his phone, but instead he was met with a blank stare. “Okay.”

“Okay?”

“I already told him something was up like, last week.”

Kuroo blinked at this, processing the information. “I… I thought we decided that we weren’t telling him until he got back?”

“No, we decided that  _ you  _ weren’t telling him because you’d absolutely make it seem like he’s on his deathbed or something. You made Akiteru panic to the point of trying to fly home two days after he landed in Australia. Let me read the conversation.”

Kuroo handed his phone over wordlessly and headed off to the bedroom, quickly fixing the bed up and leaving his boyfriend to scan over the exchanged messages. When he came back, Tsukushima was holding his phone out, nodding as he yawned again.

“Will he wake up if we move him to the bed?” Kuroo asked, shoving his phone into his pocket as he yawned.

“He’s had little to no sleep lately. He’s like a corpse, but not really.”

“So... he’s not a corpse at all?” Kuroo raised an eyebrow.

“Oh my  _ God _ , just shut up and carry him.” And with that, he disappeared down the hallway towards their bedroom.

Kuroo let out a laugh, picking up a sound asleep Akaashi like he had earlier. He made his way to his and Kei’s bedroom where a waiting Tsukishima had the blanket pulled back. Together they gently manoeuver their friend into a comfortable position, where he immediately rolled over with a soft sigh.

He took the left side - usually Kuroo’s side - so Tsukishima climbed in on his own side, Kuroo immediately following and wrapping himself around his boyfriend. It took numerous minutes before they had settled into a position where they were both comfortable, and no more words were exchanged as they drifted into unconsciousness. 

* * *

Akaashi groaned as a car honking outside pulled him from his sleep. He rolled over, and buried his face further into his pillow, but it was too late. He sat up, disorientated and blinked a couple of times before noticing a repetitive clacking sound, turning to see Kuroo typing away on his laptop.

“Good morning,” Kuroo grinned enthusiastically, expression not changing even at Akaashi’s grimace at his volume, “or should I say good afternoon?”

This made Akaashi pause - how long had he been  _ asleep? _ Sensing the question before he could even speak it, Kuroo answered. “It’s half past one. You want lunch?”

“No, I’m good thank you… I should be going, actually.” Akaashi tugged the duvet off of his figure, slipping out of the bed and wiping sleep from his eyes.

“It was a rhetorical question. You’re eating, but we can head back to yours if you prefer. I haven’t seen Owl for a while now, either. Perfect timing.” Kuroo set his laptop down on the now empty space beside him, standing up and groaning as he stretched. 

It seemed Akaashi was still too fatigued to be suspicious, which suited Kuroo perfectly. Akaashi felt gross being in the same clothes without changing the night before, but a shower could wait. He headed out to the living room as Kuroo pulled on his clothes and had a bag packed for if he got called into work earlier than he expected. 

Within twenty minutes, they were sitting in Kuroo’s car again, Kuroo rambling about some stories that bordered on gossip that Oikawa had told him the previous week. Akaashi was able to actually conversate this time, but it was obvious by the dark circles under his eyes still noticeable despite the glasses framing his face which usually hid them well that he was far from being well rested.

When Kuroo had finished his story, he started asking Akaashi about his internship and classes. It felt nice to talk like this - almost like he was with Bokuto. The pang of loneliness hit once again and Kuroo immediately noticed, filling the pregnant silence by turning the radio volume up. They eventually arrived and Akaashi led the way up to their apartment, fumbling with the keys slightly. He threw open the door just as Owl, their pet cat, made her way over. 

“Owl!” Kuroo cheered, scooping the cat up as they walked through the door. They left their shoes and jackets at the door, with Akaashi beelining towards the bathroom for a shower.

“Can I make some food?” Kuroo yelled down the hallway. Akaashi sighed, but before he could even respond Kuroo could be heard again; “I’m doing it anyway!”

Akaashi dragged himself into the shower, physically wilting as the hot water hit his skin. He took his time with washing himself, leaning his head against the tiled wall after washing the shampoo out. He stood there, basking in the heat provided by the steady stream until he heard Kuroo call for him.

He pulled on a pair of pyjamas bottoms and one of Bokuto’s hoodies that was oversized on him, making his way out of the bedroom to find Kuroo at the dining table with two dishes of steaming curry.

He took his place and they both muttered their thanks before digging in. This was the first proper home cooked meal that Akaashi had eaten in about three weeks, having resorted to random combinations of whatever was quickest. He practically inhaled his food, Kuroo grinning victoriously when he finished the entire thing.

Akaashi sat quietly as Kuroo finished his own plate, choosing to stare out of the window beside them as the sky darkened. Akaashi loved the rain, usually he’d cuddle up with Bokuto on the couch and they’d fall asleep either watching reality shows while making dumb comments or some new documentary that Bokuto had found.

He was pulled out of his thoughts when he heard a quiet meow, and he looked down to see Owl sitting at his feet, staring up at him. He smiled softly and bent down to pick her up, giving a rub as she pawed at his chest.

“I missed you too, Owl.”

“I’m turning the Playstation on,” Kuroo said as he stacked the plates and cutlery, going to put them in the dishwasher, “I’m very kind and generous so you can work on your assignment beside me but you’re taking breaks.”

Akaashi picked up Owl and then gently dropped her onto Kuroo’s lap as he went to go grab his laptop from the bag Kuroo had brought back. He settled against the arm of the couch as he pulled out his textbook and began pouring over what he had last wrote. He made the necessary corrections, muttering to himself under his breath.

Normally he’d be conscious of this habit, but he’d known Kuroo since he was fifteen - they were well adjusted to each other’s habits. He had been working for forty five minutes, the sound of whatever game Kuroo was playing providing a constant hum he tuned out just enough to focus, before Kuroo nudged him and handed over a glass of water and an apple.

“Ten minute break, doctor’s orders.”

“You never went to med school, you chose business,” Akaashi pointed out as his phone buzzed on the armrest. He picked it up and saw it was numerous photographs from Bokuto, both selfies and group photographs with other teams. He sent back a message about how they looked great and asking if they could call later. Bokuto was probably in the gym, so he didn’t expect a reply until that night.

He placed his phone back down and bit into his apple, watching as Kuroo tried to complete a heist in Grand Theft Auto V. He set his laptop down on the coffee table, opting to watch for a bit longer.

The loneliness he always felt when in their apartment whilst Bokuto was away was barely noticeable for today, maybe because his friends had finally intervened. The hard part was yet to come though - letting Bokuto know how much he had let himself go in order to overwork himself. He was now done nearly most of his term work, which in itself was concerning as the new term had just begun the previous month. He wasn’t quite familiar with the game, but he knew enough from watching Bokuto to point out mistakes to Kuroo, such as: “I think you’re going the wrong way.”

“No I’m not, I’ve done this three times!” Kuroo groaned as he was, in fact, going the wrong way - which he learnt when he got surrounded by cops.

Akaashi just laughed as Kuroo complained, returning again to his assignment; he was actually making progress. He had just surpassed the minimum word count, and with that he felt some tension dissipate. He could pass his class, maybe. As long as the assignment was good. 

He lost himself in his work to the point that he hadn’t even noticed it getting darker, until it was now six in the evening. He blinked as his laptop was pulled from his hands and looked up to see Tsukishima standing over him.

“When did you get here?” His eyebrows furrowed, confusion taking over his features. His mind scrambled for any memory of Kuroo leaving or Tsukishima entering, but he came up empty handed.

“About an hour and a half ago. Kuroo left an hour ago. He told me to take your laptop at six.” 

“What have you been doing?” Akaashi stood up, wincing as he stretched. He picked up the apple remains that he had left on the coffee table earlier and the now empty glass of water, making his way to the kitchen.

“I redid all of the heists that Kuroo failed at. I ordered some food about twenty minutes ago, it’ll be here any minute.”

Tsukishima was still in his work uniform, minus the apron. “I came here from work but it’s getting late so I’m probably going to head back home in a minute, the bus is in about fifteen minutes.”

Akaashi frowned, looking out of the window at the sky. A few raindrops were on the window and if the dark clouds were anything to go by, there’d be more soon. “I can drive you, it’ll be faster. It looks like it’s going to rain”

“No, no, you stay here. I can handle a bus ride.” Kei waved a hand. “I ordered you a pizza, I hope that’s alright.”

“You aren’t eating? I’m not sure I can finish a whole pizza by myself...” 

Akaashi’s eyes followed as Tsukishima sat back down on the couch, now pulling on his shoes. “No, Tetsu and I are going out for dinner with Akiteru and Tenma tonight. You’ll be fine.”

“What are you going to eat?” Akaashi settled himself back on the couch after refilling Owl’s catfood, watching as she slinked across the room to eat.

“Food, ideally.” Tsukishima replied dryly, a smirk on his face. Akaashi just rolled his eyes. If he was anybody else, he’d probably assume that it was intended to be rude - but he had known Tsukishima for years; this was simply part of his nature.

A notification chime cut off the conversation and Tsukishima pulled out his phone, checking what Akaashi assumed to be a notification. His face remained neutral for the most part, but Akaashi could see a gleeful shine in his eyes as he suddenly stood up. “Pizza’s here, time for me to go.”

“You don’t have to leave so soon, really I can drive you-”

“Be a good host and walk me to the door,” Tsukishima began walking for the entrance just as the doorbell rang, Akaashi scrambling to follow, baffled by his friend’s behaviour. Akaashi was usually quite perceptive, but he was simply too tired to think far too much into the questioning behaviour of his friend. Tsukishima stood back slightly from the door and Akaashi had given up any hope of understanding, simply opting to unlock the door and pull it open, expecting a delivery man and instead seeing-

“Koutarou?” Akaashi gasped out, face to face with his boyfriend who was beaming as he held a pizza box. 

“I’m here too,” Kuroo frowned as Tsukishima fixed him with a glare. “I have a boyfriend delivery who has a pizza delivery for Akaashi Keiji.” Bokuto held the box up before he quickly stuffed it into Tsukishima’s arms as Akaashi stood frozen, staring at him with a slightly widened mouth.

Koutarou took a step forward and wrapped his arms around Akaashi, knowing that he’d snap out of it in a moment. He was proven right when as soon as he pulled Akaashi into his chest, Akaashi let out a strangled cry and hugged him back, overwhelmed.

“You’re  _ home,” _ he gasped out through tears, struggling to form a coherent thought as his breathing picked up.

Bokuto is home. Bokuto is home. Bokuto is home. Bokuto is home. Bokuto is home. Bokuto is home. Bokuto is. Bokuto home. Home. Bokuto. Home. Bokuto. HomeBokutoBokutoBokutoBokutoBokutoBokuto _ Bokuto- _

“ _ Breathe, _ Keiji.” Bokuto reminded him gently, squeezing him. Akaashi let out the breath he had been holding, and all at once it felt like the iron grip that anxiety seemed to have on him was slowly being pried off of him at long last.

“We’ll leave you two lovebirds alone,” Kuroo grinned as he grabbed Tsukishima’s arm after he had placed the pizza box in the living room and returned to the doorway, tugging him forward.

“Take care,” Tsukishima said, seemingly unfazed at Bokuto’s appearance, as they began to descend the stairs, disappearing from sight.

Akaashi let Bokuto drag him inside, gently kicking the door shut behind him. Bokuto’s smile hadn’t dropped even after he had settled them both down with the pizza box and were eating. He launched into stories of his final matches and the overall tournament, which they had ultimately won.

“It was so good, ‘Kaashi! But I really missed you. I’m sorry I was gone for so long.” Bokuto pouted, taking another bite of his pizza.

Akaashi shook his head, swallowing his food before replying. “Don’t apologise, it can’t be helped. You’re here now. You’re home.”

Bokuto opened his mouth as if he was about to ask something, but Akaashi quickly stuffed more pizza in his mouth, knowing what was coming. He was grateful that Bokuto seemed to accept he wasn’t ready to talk about it, instead choosing to wage war of who could feed the other more pizza. Neither of them were surprised when Bokuto won with a grand total of four slices compared to Akaashi’s two.

“You only won because I was unprepared,” Akaashi teased as they settled down on the couch after cleaning up, Bokuto’s back leaning against the arm rest as Akaashi placed himself between his legs. He maintained his poker face, but Bokuto could tell by the light flush on his cheeks along with the sparkle in his eyes that he was happy.

Bokuto’s arms were loosely wrapped around Akaashi’s waist as he fiddled with Bokuto’s hands. They did this often, usually when Akaashi was upset or anxious - or, like now, both.

“‘Kaashi,” Bokuto spoke up after twenty minutes, choosing his words carefully. “What’s been going on?”

Akaashi visibly tensed up at this, despite knowing it was coming. Of course this was coming, of  _ course _ he knew something was wrong. How much had he upset Bokuto by lying? Bokuto was probably going to leave him now, and Akaashi couldn’t even blame him.

Clearing his throat, Akaashi forced himself to reply. “What do you mean?” He contemplated trying to make a run for the bedroom, but Bokuto knew him well and tightened his arms around him.

“Keiji, please,” he said, a hint of desperation leaking into his tone. There was no point to running from this conversation, Akaashi knew this, but he chose to stay quiet. “Keiji. Both Tsukki and Kuroo told me it was worse than it’s ever been. Why didn’t you say anything?”

Something within Akaashi snapped and he manouvered around until he was basically straddling Bokuto, unsure of how much to admit. He couldn’t formulate his thoughts correctly and before he knew it, he was word vomiting as Bokuto listened intently.

“Because I’m a burden, Koutarou! You… you’re a professional volleyball player, you’re lively, you’re energetic. People can get along with you easily. You’re good at what you do. You’re everything that anyone could want but I… I’m nothing next to you. I need to keep working because how am I meant to face you if I fail my classes, if I’m kicked from my course? I’ll lose the internship and I won’t be able to earn more money with just some shifts at the store. I can lose sleep and miss meals if it means I pass my classes and don’t disappoint you.”

There were tears running down his face by now, yet he was unable to stop talking. “My brain just  _ won’t shut up _ and it hurts so much. I don't even know if it's all lies anymore, because it makes so much sense that you don't need me around. I want you to do what you love and I’ll always support you… I’m sorry I’m being so selfish right now. I really am. I’m never going to be good enough to deserve to be with you. And… and I’ve accepted that lately. You’re a star through and through, you’ve never stopped shining and I don’t think you ever will stop. I just struggle with accepting you’re probably going to leave me-”

Before Akaashi could even think of finishing that sentence, Bokuto had gently grabbed his face; pulling him into a kiss. Akaashi was stunned into silence even after he pulled back for air, not breaking eye contact.

“Akaashi Keiji. Do not  _ ever  _ finish that sentence. Telling you all of this won’t just… change your view on yourself, but I’m telling you the truth. Forget what your brain tells you, _I’m never leaving you_. Ever. I love you so much, and nothing can change that. I’d never just abandon you over a low grade, or whether you’re enrolled in a course or, or what your job is. I love you for you. I love you for how smart and hardworking you are, how easily you adapt, how you always keep going. I’m so proud of you always, I should say it more.”

He paused to give Akaashi a moment to process what he was saying, a small smile growing on his face. “If I’m simply a star, I think you’re the world, the universe. Everything I do revolves around you, and I don’t want that to stop. You’re the only person I’ve ever wanted to be with for the rest of my life, the one I want to eventually marry. I’ve never loved somebody as much as I love you, and everyday I am reminded of how  _ lucky _ I am that you love me back; whether it’s receiving a good morning text, a note when you’re gone to class early, or I wake up and you’re beside me. I’m never leaving you behind as long as you want me around, Keiji. You’re my everything.”

Akaashi was nearly hysterical by this point, unable to stop the floodgates of his tears. He felt absolutely ridiculous crying over this, but how could he not? Bokuto’s words held a promise of marriage, of spending the rest of their lives together. He wasn’t going anywhere. Akaashi wasn’t going to be alone now or for the rest of his life. Bokuto was here, and he was making everything brighter just by existing. It felt as if the anxiety he always carried around seemed to almost dissipate, the aggressive voices that fed his insecurities drowned out by Bokuto.

“I love you,” Akaashi spoke through his tears, attempting to hide his face behind his hands in embarrassment at how ugly he must look right now. Bokuto grabbed his wrists and pulled his hands down, cupping his cheeks and kissing him as lovingly as he had that very first time all those years ago. 

Bokuto began pressing kisses all over his face, a mumbled “I love you” with each one. He repeated this for several minutes until Akaashi had finally calmed down, plucking a tissue from the box on the coffee table and trying to make himself look presentable.

“You need to take care of yourself when I’m gone, Keiji. It’s okay to ask for help.” Bokuto spoke softly as he watched Akaashi wipe the final tears from his eyes. Even with the puffiness that came in the aftermath of crying, Bokuto could see the exhaustion on his face. Akaashi remained silent, unsure of what to say. He didn’t want to make promises he couldn’t keep. “Next time there’s a camp you should come down for a few days instead of a weekend! It’ll be fun, the team won’t mind.”

Akaashi gave a noncommittal shrug, knowing that he’d say yes when it would come to the time of his next camp. Bokuto felt around blindly behind his head until he pulled the television remote out from behind him and they moved around again; Bokuto now lying flat on his back with his head propped up on a pillow, Akaashi lying on top of him with his arms wrapped around his waist, head on his chest. Bokuto draped a blanket over them and then put on his favorite reality show to make fun of, 90 Day Fiancé. His usual mocking commentary began and Akaashi allowed a small smile to grace his face. Their two bedroom apartment which had been feeling cold, empty and desolate for weeks now finally felt like a home again.

Bokuto placed his hands in Akaashi’s hair, scratching his scalp and beaming at the content sigh he received. Not many people knew how calming Akaashi found it when somebody played with his hair, but Bokuto was the one lucky enough to bring about that sense of calm for him. Akaashi’s hair was always soft and fluffy, easy to run your fingers through; and it was just one of many things Bokuto loved about his boyfriend.

Bokuto pressed another kiss against Akaashi’s hair, knowing he wasn’t far from sleep. Aside from the general sleep deprivation he was suffering through, Bokuto knew that the crying had taken a toll on him. His chest tightened at the thought that Akaashi had been wallowing in self hatred and doubt for  _ weeks _ without Bokuto noticing - but hopefully now that his confession of his feelings was out of the way, it’d all be uphill from there.

They stayed on the couch curled up as Bokuto continued to watch his reality shows for about an hour, when he felt a cramp in his leg and so he moved slightly. Apparently, that was all that was required for Akaashi to jump awake and sit up dazed. “I’m awake, I’m fine, sorry-”

A soft smile broke out on Bokuto’s, who had previously been startled at the sudden movement, face. He quietly shushed him before leaning forward and pressing a kiss to Akaashi’s cheek before hauling himself up, dragging Akaashi with him.

He guided him to their shared bedroom, flicking off the lights and television as they went. Akaashi stumbled slightly, Bokuto’s grip on him tightening just enough so that it wouldn’t hurt but so he’d still be able to catch him if he fell. Owl padded after them into the bedroom shortly after, jumping up onto the bed and curling up at their feet whilst they slipped under the sheets. 

Akaashi ended up half lying on Bokuto’s chest, face buried in his neck as Bokuto continued to play with his hair, the other hand wrapped firmly around his waist. The world outside seemed to no longer exist, the sound of cars driving around that usually kept Akaashi awake for hours now a quiet hum in the background, rivalling the distant whirring of their refrigerator. Rain hit the window, further lulling Akaashi back to sleep.

  
  


“’m not tired, Kou,” Akaashi’s words were slurred as he nuzzled against Bokuto’s neck, sighing softly. “Wanna stay ‘wake with you.”

Akaashi was losing the battle against sleep, but he continued to try fight it, trying to keep his eyes open as they repeatedly shut. What if he woke up and Bokuto was gone again? What if his extra credit assignment was due tonight rather than three weeks from now? What if-? “Get some sleep, Keiji,” Bokuto mumbled into Akaashi’s hair as he dragged his hand along his scalp in time to the small circles he had begun tracing over his waist, dragging him from his mind. “I’ll be here when you wake up. Promise.”

And with that, Akaashi caved in and allowed himself to sleep, vaguely aware of Bokuto continuing to play with his hair as he pressed a final kiss to his forehead, nearly asleep himself. He went limp in Bokuto’s arms, basking in the warmth and safety he had been so deprived of the last few weeks.

With a final stroke to his hair, Bokuto allowed himself to follow Akaashi into unconsciousness, glad to be back home. He burrowed further into the mattress and bundle of blankets that encased the couple before he was completely gone, he muttered one final sentence that he knew Akaashi would be able to sense even as he slept.

“We have all the time in the world.”

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> thank you so much for for reading! i hope you liked it,,  
> kudos + comments appreciated but not necessary :')  
> please look after yourselves, you're wonderful and doing amazing!


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